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Why You Should Buy Your Diamond Engagement Ring Online

As I mention in The Strategist’s Guide to Buying a Diamond Engagement Ring, if you’re trying to maximize value for your budget, you should strongly consider buying your diamond from an online retailer. I make the case for this tactic in this article. Also, be sure to read How to Evaluate a Diamond Engagement Ring.

Brick and Mortar Jewelers

Let’s start with a quick look at the brick and mortar retailers.

Buying diamonds at a brick and mortar jeweler is like buying bottled water at the airport – it’s never a good deal. You will – objectively – overpay for any diamond you buy from your local jeweler.

When you buy a diamond from a brick and mortar store, you are paying not only for their huge markup, but for the store’s sophisticated lighting systems, their rent, their security, the cost of holding inventory, insurance for all of the diamonds and jewelry, the salaries of managers and salespeople, and the profits that are returned to the owners and shareholders.

While this cost structure exists for basically every jeweler, there are high-end jewelers and low-end jewelers. The low end guys – any chain you’d find in a mall except Tiffany & Co – have the worst incentives. Generally, they buy the worst diamonds and try to fool you into buying them at an insane markup. I don’t even recommend visiting low-end stores because you won’t even get a good education from their sales reps.

So I strongly recommend going to the highest end store in your area to take a look around. While high-end retailers also have enormous markups, at least they buy decent diamonds, will treat you well, and help educate you. You also won’t find as much of the sleazy sales techniques at higher end jewelers since they’re mostly dealing with a less price-sensitive customer who wants gorgeous jewelry and will basically sell themselves on the jewelry. They literally serve a different market, not just a different price point.

If your area doesn’t have any high-end jewelers, go to the nearest Tiffany & Co. where you’ll get a pleasant and consistent experience. But if you’re looking for value, do not buy from them! Tiffany diamond engagement rings are 2 to 3 times more expensive than buying online and Tiffany doesn’t use a third party to certify their diamonds.

Why Buying Online is Better

Online retailers simply don’t have most of the costs that brick and mortar jewelers do. Their business model allows for them to pass most of those savings on to you while still being able to run a healthy and self-sustaining business.

Online retailers list diamonds that other manufactures or wholesalers have rather than buying and holding their own diamonds. A good online retailer holds no inventory and may never even touch a diamond they help sell. Their job is to be a trusted marketplace like Amazon or EBay.

Online retailers don’t have to rent expensive commercial real estate in malls and shopping centers, or hire fleets of educated sales people to convince you why their diamonds are somehow different from the diamonds across the street. Online retailers also don’t have to pay the expensive advertising rates for billboard, newspaper, magazine, direct mail, and television ads.

If buying a diamond online sounds risky, you need to do more research. The two most reputable online retailers – James Allen and Blue Nile – have better return, resizing, and upgrade policies than most brick and mortar retailers. And aside from the huge price differentials, online retailers also have much better selection.

Until the diamond cartel is broken up, you’re going to overpay for your diamond. But you don’t have to overpay twice.

After I bought my diamond and ring online, I stumbled upon this regretful article from a guy who almost bought a ring online and then, in his words, “chickened out.” If you’re on the fence about buying online, I recommend reading his story.

Knowing I could simply return the ring if I didn’t like it made my final decision much easier. And if I ever need to buy a diamond again, I won’t even consider a brick and mortar retailer.

Final Considerations for Buying Online

There came a point when I was confident that the diamond I was about to buy online was going to be fantastic. But I still had questions for James Allen – the online retailer I selected.

Q: Could I save some time, hassle, and money by buying the ring online too and have James Allen do the setting? Would they do a nice job?

A: Yes. At this point in the process I could feel myself becoming exhausted from the process of doing so much research and making so many decisions. So I took a break for a bit and then dug back in for one last round of research. People love their rings set by James Allen and I love how well mine was done too. I looked at the diamond ring I bought under 60x magnification and I was much more impressed by the quality and symmetry of the setting than I had expected to be.

Q: Was the shipping secure? Did I need to be there to sign for the ring?

A: Yes, shipping is secure and insured. Someone must sign for the ring and a note cannot substitute for a signature.

Q: Was the box discrete?

A: Yes, very. It doesn’t say James Allen or anything about rings anywhere.

The presentation of the ring (and associated paperwork) was classy and high quality. I’m very pleased with everything about the experience.

James Allen also has a 30-day, no-questions-asked return policy and a 60-day resizing policy. They also perform free inspections and cleanings, every 6 months – all you have to do is pay for insured shipping ($30) and they ship the ring back to you for free.

My biggest complaint about James Allen had to do with how you select the ring size. I knew that I needed a 4.75 size ring but the web interface only had options in half size increments. It wasn’t clear that they could make the ring a 4.75 and it wasn’t obvious where to even make this request. (As of late 2017 the answer is put notes like this in the “Special Instructions” box during the checkout process.)

The silver lining of this minor annoyance was that I had an opportunity to test out some of their customer support. I got a clear answer immediately and the person helping me didn’t try to nudge me at all to make a purchase. I tested their customer service a second time to better understand the process of getting a ring cleaned.

Finally, it’s worth mentioning here that I did research the other reputable online diamond retailer, Blue Nile. From my experience, their loose diamonds are very similar and you can find high-value diamonds on either site. I didn’t, however, like Blue Nile’s packaging and presentation and I was able to get a much better look at diamonds on the James Allen site. James Allen had 20x magnification for every diamond I looked at while some Blue Nile diamonds didn’t have images at all. Blue Nile is the only other online retailer aside from James Allen that the pros like, but it just wasn’t the right choice for me.

Be sure to check out:

Checklist for Buying a Diamond Engagement Ring

Feel free to print this page.

Diamond Checklist:

☐ Read Why You Shouldn’t Buy a Diamond.
☐ Read The Strategist’s Guide to Buying a Diamond Engagement Ring.
☐ Commit to making an unemotional, well-educated, outcome-focused, patient, confident, and tradeoff-filled decision.
☐ Confirm that you’ll be buying a diamond and not another gemstone.
☐ Write down your upper budget, an amount that you will absolutely not spend more than.
☐ Write down the amount that you think you’ll actually end up spending.
☐ Read How to Evaluate a Diamond Engagement Ring.
☐ Decide whether how much you’ll be involving your future fiancée. The spectrum is anywhere from 99% surprise to she’ll be there when I buy the ring. Understand that there are a lot of great options between these two. Check one*:
⟶ ☐ 99% surprise (they always sort of know)
⟶ ☐ Get her size and basic preferences
⟶ ☐ Decide everything together and buy the exact ring she wants
☐ Read Why You Should Buy Your Diamond Engagement Ring Online.
☐ Have an initial conversation with your future-fiancée. Get initial answers to the following from your fiancée:
⟶ ☐ Ring size
⟶ ☐ Ring color and material
⟶ ☐ Ring style & setting
⟶ ☐ Diamond shape
☐ Prepare to visit a jeweler in person. Make a list of questions and know what options you’d like to see.
☐ Visit a high-end local jewelry shop near you. Avoid the big chain stores in malls with ads on TV. Worst case, go to your nearest Tiffany & Co. Your mission is education so come prepared, get your questions answered, listen to their pitches, try on a bunch of ring designs and styles, look at real diamonds with both your naked eye and at 10x magnification. Get a salesperson’s card or contact information so that you can ask more questions later. Buy nothing.
☐ Have a follow up conversation with your fiancée and continue to refine your diamond search criteria:
⟶ ☐ Certifier (GIA only)
⟶ ☐ Cut (“Excellent” only for GIA)
⟶ ☐ Ring size
⟶ ☐ Ring color and material
⟶ ☐ Ring style & setting
⟶ ☐ Diamond shape
⟶ ☐ Clarity range
⟶ ☐ Color range
⟶ ☐ Carat
☐ Perform an initial search for diamonds online so that you can see your options. Look at rings and settings as well. (As of December 2017, I can only recommend James Allen or Blue Nile, with a preference for James Allen)
☐ Call or email the jeweler you met with and ask for a few all-in quotes, including certifications for the diamonds. Ask about their return policy and any fees they charge for returns. Understand their resize and cleaning/inspection fees as well.
☐ Compare all of the quotes.
☐ Take a few days to think things over. Unless you’re in a huge hurry, a few days won’t matter and you might make a substantially better decision.
☐ Decide whether you’re comfortable buying a diamond online or not.
☐ Refine the amount that you think you’ll be spending (but not your upper budget). Double check that this amount works with your financial situation.
☐ Narrow down your ring styles to 1 or 2 options.
☐ Continue researching, reading, etc until you have clear answers to each of the following:
⟶ ☐ Certifier (GIA only)
⟶ ☐ Cut (Excellent only for GIA)
⟶ ☐ Ring size
⟶ ☐ Ring color and material
⟶ ☐ Ring style & setting
⟶ ☐ Diamond shape
⟶ ☐ Clarity range
⟶ ☐ Color range
⟶ ☐ Carat range
☐ Search for diamonds that meet your criteria.
⟶ ☐ Sort the list in various ways (by carat, by price, by clarity).
⟶ ☐ Eliminate any diamonds that have large inclusions or blemishes near the table or any of the largest facets. Keep only eye-clean diamonds.
☐ Make a final decision and place your order.
☐ Finalize any of the details for how you plan to give your future-fiancée the ring.

* From this point on, this checklist assumes that you’re going to have a few conversations with your future-fiancée about her preferences and that the two of you will go to try on rings at least once. You can adapt the checklist based on how involved you plan for her to be.

Why You Shouldn’t Buy a Diamond

Diamonds are sort of terrible.

    • They have poor a resale value and are therefore not a good store of value or a good investment.
    • They are both expensive and over-priced.
    • They are brittle and easy to lose.
    • They are primarily in demand because of an incredibly successful century-long marketing campaign.
    • They are a very complex product and jewelers use their information asymmetry to take advantage of buyers.
    • They are mostly controlled by a cartel that artificially constricts supply (collusion) to inflate prices. The cartel is supported primarily by bribing government officials wherever diamonds are found.
    • They are often mined by people in pretty terrible situations. And even though some people’s situations might be even worse if they weren’t mining diamonds, the industry might not be something that you want to willingly support.
    • They often distract from the meaning that they supposedly symbolize (a couple’s love in the case of a diamond engagement ring).
    • Finally, there are many substitutes and near-substitutes for diamonds like other gemstones, moissanite, cubic zirconia, and lab diamonds – each of which don’t have most of these problems.

But even though there are so many reasons not to buy diamonds, you may find yourself in a position where you’re going to get one anyway. This doesn’t make you or your fiancée evil. It just makes you human.

If you are lucky, there may be a diamond in your family that’s not being used. Ask for it. If your diamond is for an engagement ring, then using a family diamond not only adds more meaning to the gift but it’s also a smart financial move – wins for any budding partnership.

You have no control over the diamond cartels, their century of market manipulation, and their consumerist advertising – you’re already screwed there. But if you’re going to buy a diamond, you might as well not get screwed a second time by things you can control.

If this is the position you’re in, check out my other posts here:

Announcing Straty.com

Welcome to Straty.com – a website focused on strategy.

Among the many things that I think we – as a society – undervalue, strategy is one of the most ill-defined, misunderstood, and ignored topics. This devaluation makes some sense: Strategy can be so fuzzy, so slippery, so intangible and un-actionable that it seems as if only con artists, posing as successful businessmen, dominate the field.

But clearly there’s real value in strategy as well. Wars – both literal and figurative – are won and lost because of the ideas in the heads of just a few people. On the battlefield of business, trillions of dollars flow around our increasingly global economy each year. Within a single industry, each corporate player seeks to maximize profits and monopolize market share, while start-ups attempt to destroy the old way with their technological, marketing, or business model innovations. And each individual is trying to get that promotion, close that deal, and expand their mini-empire.

The stakes are high.

The competition is fierce. The game is relentless. And never starting is always a losing strategy. So this is Straty’s start.

And while I have many aspirations for this project, but I would be lying if I said I knew what this will become. I’ve planned, plotted, and pivoted for too long now and so I’m both excited and anxious to finally hit the publish button. With a little luck and a ton of hard work I hope to polish strategy’s tarnished name and create content worth consuming.

Finally, I want to thank you – whoever you are – for your attention, encouragement & thoughtful critiques – which I expect will push me in new and often uncomfortable ways.